Someone asked, “Should I pursue my education until the highest level or should I work first and have family first?”
Depends on what? Well, a few things. For one thing, it depends on you. What do you want with your life? What are your life plans? What are your life goals? At the end of the day, this is your life and you are responsible for it.
You are a young adult now, and you should learn how to make your own decisions about your own life.
Having said that, you don’t live in a vacuum. Other people are a part of your life, especially your family and your parents. So the next thing to consider is how well you discuss with them. You have to be able to communicate with your parents about your life plans and make reasonable negotiations.
You should be able to tell them and show them that you are adult enough to make decisions of your own. If not, then they are going to make decisions for you. But to do that, you have to first figure out what you want in your life and you have to discuss it with your family.
Your relationship with your parents should be based on respect, honesty, mutual understanding, and musyawarah (mature discussion). You should be listening to what they say and they should be listening to what you say. From there, both parties try to negotiate terms that both can agree on.
Conflicts will ensue, but that’s normal in any kind of relationships. You should be able to try your best to resolve those conflicts particularly because they are your family members. You don’t want things to go too deep or too far to a point where people grow apart. At the same time, you don’t want to keep all your feelings inside because it will be a matter of time before you explode.
Conflicts is the risk, but it is a worthy risk to take. Communication is the key to resolve conflicts and when they are resolved properly, you will grow closer to each other. That’s how relationships grow stronger.
Resolve those conflicts in ways that show that you are becoming an adult. If not, then others will control your life and make decisions for you. Unless, you show them that you are adult enough to make decisions on your own.
You have to show them. The proof comes from your actions, not your words. How? Well, one way not to do it is to throw a tantrum whenever they say “no” or whenever they say “you can’t do it”.
If you throw a tantrum, then perhaps you are not adult enough.
However, if you show composure, calmness, an ability to accept criticisms, and an ability to formulate a proper argument, then you are showing them that you are no longer the small child that they thought you were.